Wednesday, December 18th 2024
By the time I'm posting this, it's actually already past midnight, so my daily checkpoint isn't really daily, oops! Since I haven't gone to sleep yet though, in my head it's still wednesday. I couldn't actually really complete a peice of art today, since I accidentally got carried away and created a minimum 10 hours worth of rendering for myself to do. To be honest, I didn't really get to practice guitar today either, or the day before. I should really put a better effort into being consistent so my skills don't backslide lol. I do wonder how much value there in having something accomplished daily, especially when it comes to art. I don't mean just drawing, but having a finished peice. It's not like I expect to learn a new song in a day, so why should I try to make a new art piece in that amount of time?
Nonetheless, I'm really happy I set up this website, as minimal as it is currently. I feel like I've spent less time per day letting youtube and tiktok hollow out my brain these past few days. I think the next step I'd like to take is making the front page more of a gallery page and moving my little yap seshes off to some secluded blog area. It's a little embarassing when I wanna show my friends my art and I have to tell them to pay no attention to the rambling on the left.
Just this Monday I was complaining about people who complain about people for speaking how they feel and now I'm complaining about my own complaining lol...
Anyways I think it'd be fun to do some daily creative writing exercises to get my creative juices flowing a little bit. Maybe I'll put them here :D I'm gonna go tune up my guitar now because my calluses feel unused and I don't like it!
Tuesday, December 17th 2024
I think I may have too many hobbies unfortunately, or at least too many different things I'd like to get done; Too many skills I want to learn. Yesterday I spent about 1 hour drawing, one hour on my guitar, and three on my website, as well as one hour I spent on a walk out to the beach. It was a fufilling day, and I went to bed thinking about all the ideas I have for my website. This morning when I woke up, I had an itch to draw, and started on that right away. I ended up spending about 6 hours on a full-body drawing. It was a fun exercise, but there's no way I can sustain that level of dedication to drawing on the daily and still have time for everything else. I keep hoping that if I just put as much effort as possible into drawing, I'll learn how to do it faster, but I don't really know that will happen, and what if I have to cut corners or sacrifice my own enjoyment to get there. I guess it's not really that complicated, wanting to improve my skill level doesn't mean I have to no-life it just to improve faster, I just wish I guarentee myself the consistency required to improve.
When I have the time, I want to learn some Javascript, I think I could build some useful elements on this website to keep me productive. Eventually I would like to expand some of the ideas floating around in my head into some fun little web games. I had a friend in middle school who knew how to code, and we worked togther to try to make a game, but nothing ever really came to fruition with it since we were both naive kids with ideas that were too big for the two of us. I thought of him today while I was out on a walk. We don't really talk much anymore, but he seems to have his own group of people now. Back when we were closest, I think he was at a pretty miserable point in his life. Nowadays he seems a lot less apathetic than me, so it's harder for me to understand him, though I'm sure he still struggles in his own ways that I can't understand. I hope he'll stay happy for a long time.
My Art Practice for Today
Mizi from alien stage wearing a cute outfit I saw on pinterest. Sidenote but Mizi is my new favorite character because I firmly believe she will survive. I can't take anymore heartache after what happened in round 7. Rendering this took me about 6 hours. It's cool to see how much focused practice has increased my ability to render faces. Here's the store page where the reference image comes from.
Monday, December 16th 2024
Welcome to my little daily journal! I've been wanting to create a website for a long time. It's a bit of a bucket list item for me to be honest! :D Like many others, I feel that the web today is a bit stale and felt the desire to carve out my own little space in response to the lack of oppurtunites for individual expression on the internet. In doing so, I also wanted to create a space for self-expression that's a little more free of negativity than the internet at large. People generally argue that the internet in general has grown softer in past years, but I feel that people are more arugmentative and vitriolic to each other than they have been in the past. I feel that people are less open to hearing from each other in general. What used to be regular discourse is now "yapping". It's normalized for people to be casually cruel to each other.
I think some people will find this sort of sentiment overly sensitive, which I believe is a justifiable opinion. It's not my goal to catastrophize or argue against the experiences of others, and I agree that there are many good aspects to the internet today. All I want to express is that to a sensitive person like me, the modern internet feels a bit demoralizing. In that light, I want to use my own website as a way to hold myself responsible for my continued self-improvement and create a space that is inspiring for both myself and others :D
About me
I am a 19 year old university student from the US currently studying science education. I love to learn about nature and biology, but in my free time I also like to draw, play instruments, and learn all sorts of new skills. While I'm an extremely motivated person when I put my mind to a subject, I also tend to overindulge in my hobbies and burn myself out. I'm also super distractable and spend way too much time on youtube and tiktok especially. I'm kind of hoping that the upcoming tiktok ban in the US will actually help me get off my phone more, even though I personally disagree with it.
Additional Facts:
- My promouns are she/they
- I'm neurodivergent, but for financial reasons I am not currently diagnosed with any specific condition
- While I don't really take personality types too seriously anymore, I'm an INFP 4w5 lol
- wlw (winners love winning)
- I'm a caffeine junkie tbh
- I love Jpop, Jrock, vocaloid, and Math Rock
Media I enjoy:
- Alien Stage
- Project Sekai
- Bungou Stray Dogs
- Bocchi the Rock!
- Yuri!!! on ICE
- Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood
- Doki Doki Literature Club
- Minecraft
- Kakegurui
- Serial Experiments Lain
- My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
- Ouran High School Host Club
- Banana Fish
- Your Lie in April
- Blue Period
My current goals for this website:
- Create a gamified xp system to encourage me to take care of myself and work towards my goals in a constructive and healthy manner
- Document my personal growth in digital art, guitar, and any other skills I pick up along the way
- Connect with others in a positive way, and possibly create interactive elements for visitors
- Make my website as polished and neat as possible
My Art Practice For Today
A little resin duck I got for 50 tickets from the arcade. I like the little reflections. Since I just wanted a bit of practice I only drew for an hour.